o foreign parts I have

ement our friendly relations with fo

things in gene

etting municipal rings, cornering the Beef Trust, and camping on the trail of every corporation that se

me I could spare from dodging table d'h?te dinners

n American consul I am following the advice of a f

esents itself write something entirely irrelevant-something that has nothing to do with anything in particular. The less you say about foreign countries the better you will

owed instructions rather closely. If any dates, statistics, or useful information

out to the Arc de Triomphe and then cuts through the Bois de Boulogne. Fearing that this subject matter had been t

ear, he couldn't be a really successful grafter. He finds himself plumped down in a strange country. About the time that he begins to learn the language and has saved up enough money to buy evening clothes he is recalled and goe

g appointments. But he never had asked anything for himself. His two boys went to college at Ann Arbor, and when the younger came home with his degree and began to take a hand in running the paper Mr. Willoughby found himself, for the first time in his life, relieved of wearing responsibilities. He was well fixed financially and still in the prime of life-not due to retire permanently, but ready to take i

and see

as consul. And, of course, apart from the financial advantage, there would be the glory of representing a great nation and hoisting the flag over a benighted foreign population. The suggestion appealed very strong

-the abode of perpetual summer and already enjoying a preliminary boom as a resort. The acting consul had been a British subject. The pay was so small that no enterprising American had wanted the job. "United States Consul

unimpeachable character and great ability-all of which was true. They might have added that he

ew importance. Mrs. Willoughby was given a formal farewell by the ladies of the congregation assembled in the church parlours. Mr.

wung around a curve and they found themselves headed straight for Gallivancia and glory. Both of them felt a little heart-achey and dubiou

e obtained, unless the bottle happened to be empty. The women exchanged calls and gave formal dinners and drove about in rickety little victorias with terrified natives in livery perched upon the box. The lines of social precedence were closely drawn. At a dinner party the wife of the governor preceded the wife of the military commander who, in turn, queened it over the wife of the gunboat, who looked down upon the wife of the magistrate, and so on. The women smoked cigarettes and gambl

a Europeanised aristocratic society they were most profoundly ignorant. Mr. Willoughby did not even own a "dress suit." When he got a clean shave and put on a string tie

rstand what must have been the attitude of these gold-braid pewe

" and said "Dyuh me!" and looked at her through their lorgnettes, she was like a staid old Plymouth Rock hen who suddenly finds herself among the birds of paradise. She told Mr. Willoughby that it was the queerest lot of "women folks" she had ever seen, and although she didn't like to talk about people until she knew

yuh

r. Willoughby more than amused the men

ped like a horseshoe. The dethroned official was courteous, but not cordial. He was saying good-by to some easy money, and the situation was not one calculated to promote good cheer. Mr. Willoughby's action in coming down and pulling th

intaining two establishments. Already he had taken into his employ and his warmest personal friendship a native named Franciotto. This name seemed formal and hard to remember, so Mr. Willoughby rechristened him "Jim." He liked

all subject to doubt that doubt vanished on the day when he and "J

hing else. Many would not believe when they first heard it, but there were witnesses-reliable witnesses-who saw the whole thing and were called upon time and time again to testify regarding the most extraordinary performance of the United States Consul. Other Consuls ma

Willoughby, with his own hands, helped to move the furniture from the old Consulate up to his new residence. He put the table on top of his head and bal

ou suppos

was set down as either a harmless imbecile or an altogether new specimen of barbarian. In either case he was not a fit associate for well-bred gentlemen, and Gallivancia proceeded to ignore him and "Ma." That is, they pretended to ignore them, but as a matter of fact, they watched them at a distance and heard daily reports of their familiariti

he harbour and saw something that smote him with an overpowering joy. A white cruiser, flying th

"Come here, if you want to see so

een brought up to believe that a man's character and his abilities give him a worth which cannot be altered by putting a mere handle to his name. Mr. and Mrs. Wi

out in a launch and taken charge of the naval officers. Dinner parties and a ball at the "Palace" were arranged at once. The servant at the club hurried out and got another bottle of Scotch whiskey, and the town band began to mobilise at a café. Gallivancia had no use for a humble American of the Willoughby type, but it gave hysterical welcome to the splendid war vessel and the natty men in uniform. Over the first drink the Americans were

hat was the day which caused them to decide to go back to Michigan. Mr. Willoughby wrote to the State Department and said that

ity, and more horse sense than could be collectively assembled by all the petty officials at Gallivancia. And yet Gallivancia regarded him as a very poor exc

ridge, and keep up with the naval crowd when it comes to drinking. Let him be haughty with the serving classes, but jovial with the military. Make sure that

NAP