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Chapter 2 HOW THREE WAGERS WERE MADE, AND ADèLE KILLED TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE

Word Count: 6732    |    Released on: 06/12/2017

y, we had mustered in the lounge of the hotel. It was when we had there bee

psetting. It's no good wishing that Bordeaux was Biarritz, or that Pau was half the distance it is from Angoulême. If you don't want to go right through, you must stay at Bordeaux. It's the only poss

of view of they that go down to the South in cars, her famous capitals could hardly have been more conveniently disposed. This very evening, by lodging us at Angoulême, she was to repeat such hospitality for th

or other, Bordeaux doesn't attract me. Incidentally,

ndeed, if we had another week on the road, you'd both be exhausted. You left my sponge and bedroom-slippers at Boulogne, m

wait till Angoulême. I woul

table. "Now, this one," he added, gingerly extracting a filthy and dilapidated rag, "is a particularly interesting specimen. Apparently, upon close inspection, merely a valuable security, worth, to be exact, a shade under twope

, "do you expe

ink that, upon offering that to a bar-tender, I shall not only not be assaulted, but shall actually receive a large bottle of beer and be lent a two-and-sixpenny glass from

ful," said J

t. What I really need is some rubber gloves and a box-respirator. Hullo! Just catch that one, will you? He's seen that dog over there.... You know, I'm

h looked a

said, "wasted fift

ate Albert." With the words, he laid a two-franc note tenderly upon

detach Albert, who instan

a shriek o

said Berry. "I'v

tion was u

gers and twice to each of my hands, I trod upon him. Some

to you all to let that dog-eared mountebank

in-law addr

ave always been reviled. I suppose it's jealousy." He turned to his wife.

referring to your body-belt

nd at Margate, I mean. With the imitation bone buttons. Ah, here we are. Now, if

o a chair and

e for all, are we going to stay at Bo

rather go right th

hesitate. I'll answer for Ping. But, frankly, with Berry driving, I doubt if Po

pregnant s

r do it," s

ked up defiantly. Then he took a thousand-franc not

erately, "that, with a start of one hour

gasp of as

more, I'll bet you another y

ed his eye

ver mind. Your dross shal

outdone, "will put anothe

After all, if I had not trained th

ou both pay me now, or wait

, "we'll have a r

we were again in the car, and my brother-in-law was threa

llaboration from the ranks of the Mechanical to the society of the Fine Arts. My part was comparatively easy. Sinking his initiative he had more nearly converted himself into an intelligent piece of mechanism than I would have believed possible. It would, of course, be vain to suggest that Pong would not have gone faster if I had been able to drive with my own hands, or Berry had had my experience. Sti

towns our system had broken down. In a crowded street, though I could still administer, Berry could not execute. When I endeavoured to allow for his inexperience of traffic, I found it impossible accurately to g

nfidence. An inch was of no use to him. He must have a good ell, and more also, before he would enter a gap. In the trough of a narrow street he laboured

sis robbed the bet of its savour. With a thousand francs at stake, it would be foolish not to take reasonable care. And the taking of reasonable care would all but eliminate

nicated my refl

the time," she replied. "But I

your money on uncle. With enough

to die." My brother-in-law obeyed. "All the same, I'm afraid we're for it. It isn't so much a q

y si

tween those two waggons

uld,"

Berry, pointing. "I mean along that temporary p

ast us, slipped between the

fter it in sil

to the temperature of my hands, from a handkerchief about six feet square. People were very nice about it, very nice. But an inability to

èle, smiling.

pending your somewhat boisterous travail? My little car is frightened.... No answer. I suppo

celerator and shut your eyes. Oh, and you might hold

to shake w

coat. I may say that, if you touch me with that mammal, I shall press and

with a protruding tongue our luckless chauffeur crept slowly past the mo

over the map and the Michelin Guide; Berry turned himself into a mechanic

r new-born stiffness beginning to wear off, Pon

covered my spirits ros

of Chatellerault, I cou

s our custom, at a charcuterie to buy our lunch, and Ping had followed our examp

mile, I regret

ngered h

"it's a condition precedent t

rse," I

id my heart good. It was plain that my i

oved of

rry. "My mouth's watering so

d Adèle

s heart," I said. "Straight

sh Fate ruled otherwise. Excuse me, but I think that that there basket or ark in which the comfort is enshrined is rather near the conduit through which flows that sparkling liquid which, when vapoured, supplies ou

ed to

gue. There's really only one way to stop him. What about lunching at

ok came into Adè

rother-in-law groaned. "Still ... I don't know.... Aft

macked

n," he said, "is

Ping swept

moment's s

dèle excitedly; "

The reflection that at the moment we had not been trying to outdistance him increased our delight. All the same, his

festive

tiers is like a

ecome a gentle-faced dominie. The sleepy music of bells calling, the pensive air of study, the odour of simple piety, the sober confidence of great possessions, are most impressive. Poitiers has beaten her swords into crosiers and her spears into tuning-forks. Never was there an old age so ripe, so mellow, so becomi

used her, certainly. Dread Harry Plantagenet gave her a proud cathedral. Among her orchards Coeur de Lion worshipped Jehane, jousted, sang of a summer evening, and spent his happiest days. Beneath her shadow the Black Prince light

t see what I have brought forth. If memori

. Broad, straight, smooth as any floor, the great highway stretched like a str

indy town in tim

ement, before we had been there ten minutes, our cousin arrived with Ping and the same object. Had the incident occurred at Poitiers, I should have been enco

ng speed. Twice we had had to stop altogether and start again. He had, of course, reproached himself violently, and I had made light of the matter. But, for all the comfort I offered him, I was seriously alarmed. I

my injury, upon a couch, and she upon a cushion beside me-before the comfort of a g

married yo

ed at

we both,

ther you are really, or whet

e, he may be making the best of a bad job. As a worldly goo

ery happy before

ught we

her head around, to see my face

ft brown eyes was irresistible.

u," I said

" was the disc

n, why sho

said you

d the S

ullied. The woman we love is

looked at us. Then

dèle, caressing hi

ing my caus

said Adèle. "I wi

ing for love of you-you've only got to smile to make them rich-and you set your smal

very interesting! 'Heels I have Held,'

I regar

id I, "and I shan't

ossed h

that," she said. "Dir

hed sa

tomobiles," I said

y wife. "And Ber

rd to it ever since I knew you. I've dreamed about it. You're miles cleverer than I am, you're wise, you're quick-witted, you can play,

smooth hand u

're not in the same street with their master, they kn

s generosity there

mad

h you to dr

came into the

" said Adèle,

*

ue heaven, new-swept by a steady breeze. Limping into the courtyard before breakfast, I r

strapped into place and my brother-in-law climbed into the car. With a sigh for a bad beginning, I reflected th

d by, watc

ready?"

odd

we've picked the best route, but it's

agr

u don't

of the q

e to double

But I'll bet with you. I can't afford much, but I'

id my cousin. "And I sta

ers had been hitherto above reproach, utterly refused to sta

e the trouble-which was in the magneto-

e, an impatient clock anno

approaching a certainty. Indeed, unless we could break the back of the distance before daylight failed, our chances of reaching Pau before ten were worth little. If the

bly untouched for over six years, the wear and tear to which, as one of the arteries springing from a great port, it had been sub

ervous hopes that the going would grow no worse. After that, Berry and I lost interest and suffered in si

ever, kept u

by heart, and was just burning to pilot us

s are like. And the road's really tricky. But I spent two hours looking it

book,

o worse for us than it is for them, and after Bordeaux it'll probably be splendid. Of course we

postulated, "I

ng her right, I got the lunch, and we can eat that without st

nt out that, if our opponents had any sense at

," added Adèle. "Put

thusiasm, we bent

gh speed and a rude surface conspired to dislodge it-a shortcoming which caused us all three much discomfort and lost a lot of mileage. Then, again, I dared not let him drive too close to the side of the road. Righ

fifty-four of them lay behind us. All things considered, this was extremely good

, that I should feed Be

introduce one end of a

I admit it's a bit of a rosebud, but that's no excuse for all these 'outers.' Yes, I know it's a scream, but I was once told never to put foie gras upon the nose or cheeks. They say it dr

rd and took the dishevelled san

" He dabbed his face with a handkerchief. "Never mind. When his hour comes, you'll hav

hould have to stop for petrol, Berry must

"a rest of a quarter of

noticed for the first time tha

never turned a hair. Now, however, he seemed to be driving with an effort.

kly, "you ought to hav

tting done in f

me a path

hap. It's-- Hang it a

rheumatism cropped up

rder w

we had left Poitiers, any quick movement o

ould not hear, declaring that, so long as Jonah was behind, victory was not out of sight, and that nothing

and when we stopped at a garage in Bordeaux, it w

s mouth full and a glass of beer in his hand, when, with an apologetic cough, Ping emerged from behind an approaching tram a

transparently clear that Adèle and I, at any rate, had lost our mon

oy

darl

the las

t have finished for

ide

a bit, just till he'

at my w

shouldn't, dear, exce

rather rough

er all, we shall be moving. And it can't affect the

ed rue

a hundred and fifty miles in front of us, and seven hours-five of them after dark-t

r know,"

process of masticati

ly. "One thing's certain. She

r know,"

ver's seat, and I had folded the

y took

gently.... Well done. Change.... Good girl! N

e, changing into third, and da

hen: "Look out for that tr

anding, I caught my bro

ive!" I sai

id Berry, "I'm

ive!" We flashed between two waggons. "Look at that! She's

aid Adèle, "is how we're to pa

electric si

our back." A portly Frenchman leaped into safety with a scream. "That's the style. For-rard! F

y lifted up his voice and barked like a demoniac. The ungodly hullaballoo with which we shook the dust

eft the terrier and Berry to finish th

oft hair, too, was now at the wind's mercy, and but for a little suede hat, which would have suited Rosalind, the dark strand that lay flickering upon her cheek would have been one of many. Chin in air, eyebrows raised,

ry proud

s driver, I found it difficult to appreciate that a small silk-stockinged

mile deepened, and a little gloved ha

back and kissed t

g to teach you,

I'd arranged everything. I

ward to it so much

cried Adèle. "It was so dear of y

ght to have driven from Boulogne. Don't tell me why you held your peace, because I know. And I think

ar fl

cows and once upon a large flock of sheep. We coul

x, I looked at my watch. Two minutes to four. Adèle noticed

nough," she

fail now, and I asked if sh

ook he

yet,

long incline, a glance at the speedometer showed me that we were doin

nto the distance

y to right and left, coughed at cross-streets, and then swept ou

ife if she would h

yet,

aise the w

eas

closed the window. The rush of the cool air was more than freshening, an

ar to

, steady, conspicuous. One only, far in the distance, seemed ill-defi

said Adèl

was

uld see the smear aga

s tai

nt. Beside me I could hear Berry

ck it up again a moment later. Each time it was

he sudden appearance of a cluster of bright pin-pricks im

ger. Jonah was slowing up for the town. In a

ed one another. Somewhere be

the two cars. And my unsuspecting cousin was going dead slow

ing, Adèle slowed up a

screamed to

throwing away the c

I laid my ha

hoarsely. "My dar

ittle crow of rejoicing and tu

passed s

rward, the scales

ejoin the main road at a point ahead of Jonah, the

at my wife knew the plan of

e were using ran on to a bridge. It was there,

hrust on to the bridg

turn?" I stammered. "

utiful road. "Ah, this is more like it. I don't know where Jonah's going, but this is the way to Pau.... And now I think it'll be safe to have

*

en that evening

, we put the car awa

when Ping discharged his pas

he landing we watched

all inside, I

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