Diary of the not so wimpy kid

In an abandoned apartment a 42-year-old neet was beating his meat to some weird incest porn, the poor lad's name was Walt Harding, Walt was a was poor... poor sod with patchy stubble, dark baggy eye sockets, bad breath, balding messy hair, and a beer belly to boot.

Currently, it was storming heavily right outside Walt's terrible apartment, On the news yesterday it said to evacuate the city because of the severe flooding and thunder, but nonetheless, Walt was still going hard and strong.

"Keep going oooooh keep going I love I love itttttttttttt" Walt yelled in pleasure as he stained his monitor in his fluids. Little did Walt know the water was leaking in from his ceiling onto his computer, Walt was ready for round two before the power went out.

"Damn it I hate this place but with my current funds, I can't afford to leave this place they call an apartment," Walt said in a furious rage, Walt then began to shake his computer in a neet rage but then a heavy electrical shock went through Walt's body sending him straight to the grave. As he fell to the ground on his back dead his boner was still hard as a rock staring straight at the leaky ceiling.

Walt felt a warm sensation around him as if he was in a ball, Walt's mind felt very cloudy once in a while he'd open his eyes then close them and didn't know if it's been 2 months or 2 days. [first-person]I fucking hate this world and everyone in it, before I was in the apartment I was world-renowned for my inventions and exploits in science, math you name it, but I was in a severe car accident that gave me brain damage and I lost my unique mind and lost the money and success that came with it.

My mind is starting to feel weird though, my mind gets clearer and clearer as time passes in this warm comfy place, and from my calculation, this is a womb, after my fall from grace I got super invested in reading light novels and some of the mc's get reincarnated and this is the only thing I can think of in my situation, besides me being dead and this being the afterlife.

I started making long and big calculations to test the limits of my brain, and to my surprise the more I started doing calculations the easier it got, but I knew soon it would be time to be birthed into the new world I shall face. I felt this pushing sensation and then I saw a white light and I knew it was time, as I was pushed out the cold and bright lights surprised me a little bit but I was able to against.

I knew I needed to cry to sell the act of being a baby, "waaaaaaaaa" I acted like I was a crying baby, but I still scanned my surroundings, I saw the staff that helped me with my birth then I saw my parents because of their expressions I knew they were my parents

Soon things calmed down and both my mom and father held me in their arms, my mother was a milf with dark brown hair and ample breasts wearing a hospital gown, while my father with brown hair and a square jaw also wearing a suit and tie.

I decided to scale down my crying and act like I fell asleep, as the I started acting The doctor spoke, "Mr and Mrs. Heffly it's a boy" the doctor said with joy Hmm, Heffly that name rings a bell but I need some more things to base my knowledge on, I continued to act like I was asleep the nurse put me somewhere where they'll keep watch over me.

While I was starting to fall asleep I wanted to check if I had any special powers and surprisingly I felt this weird energy, as I closed my eyes I imagined as if the energy was flowing into my core and building ever slowly.

This went on for hours before I felt something, it was a warm feeling, but what surprised me was my head felt like a nice cool wind blew over it, I need to test this more later, but I continue to accurate this energy within myself. Soon morning came as I assumed because my mother and father came to get me, my mother picked me up with care, they walked to their car, as they walked out I looked at the world and it surprised me how mundane it was It looks like this is Earth.

As they drove they started talking, "Susan I think you should've stayed at the hospital a little longer" my father said, "Frank that hospital is so uncomfortable I just wanted to get home and relax" My mother Susan said.

My mind nearly blew up, I Immediately recognized these names I'm in the world of fucking Diary of a wimpy kid.