message again. A

, her tone hollow. I could hear it-she missed me. But I couldn't bring myself to

ound my chest like chains. And sometimes I wonder if it's better not to say anything at all. Be

forgot the

. But in my heart, she's still mine. She might have p

I'm a lesbian. Fully

s the same-obsession. They become obsessed with me. Needy. Intense.

like being wrapped in a warm b

stor. Yeah, im

one knows. Not my church friends. Not my family. Not even my neighbors. So

changed

ink much of it. Then-ping-a like. Then a DM. I opened it, and it was from

our first

. God...

er closing my eyes just to hear her talk. And when she ask

ked. In

ce notes in whispers like we were each other's secrets. And somewhe

ma's love

ul, but

in my own mess. I loved that she cared... but it was too much sometimes. She doesn't know that I have anxiet

pulle

ed call. One late re

d. Of cour

do I say, "I don't know"? Because that's the

paragraph that I honestly didn't finish because it hurt too much. My chest tightened. I

ed her: "

st, like alway

was a proble

ction anymore." I tried to explain that I had things both

it w

e always added a small "lol" even when things weren't funny. B

me more than

now, my birthday is this Sunday... but I'm not excited. What's a birth

ll lo

scared t

ust maybe... she's