Sold to my crush: Alexander Dankworth

Lost in

bled into the horizon like an open wound. July's heat pressed heavy aga

ith signatures that never reached me-words meant for someone else, a ghost version of myself. Dad said I should b

ile enough to keep the sharp edges of the world from cutting too deep. Now

was the silence

s rich voice that sounds like velvet soaked in honey. He

I don't think I'm thr

*

man. He had a lopsided grin on his pale white face, the same one he wore whenever when he brought home surprises or dragged me to bad rom-coms. He h

ng my thick duvet over my head. "You ever hea

ar." He dragged his words, tugging the duvet ge

, I knew he was trying to help. I

barely above a whisper but I knew he

bout today. I played a thousand and twelve versions of the What if's of today -yet, nothin

s I birthed and nurtured

my usual amour; loose pants and an

like my name-Lily O'Sull

I could now see myself clearly- my big emerald eyes, full pink lips that has been alleged a hundred

of myself more clearly-the dark circles around my eyes, the fain

eath

beauty flow down my back, framing my face. I love my hair, it was one

all the misfortunes it caused me, the hungry eyes and hands that can't decode no. A

and air. Supermo

, he would see me. Ma

is image. She always praised my beauty, perhaps it was coming from the voice of a loving mother. None of such

self, felt

Memories of Mom, of our short lived moments together, flooded back. Those evenings we would sit together

with her, even when every other person was out. People called m

this morning I'd heard the mortifying news. Stage four cancer.

e dark while she knew all along about her condition.

he'd had enough of this world. But it still hurt so much, even after all this time. I could not move on, and when I

Deep ugly sobs that made my chest ache. All the pain, all

myself into his arms, clinging to him. "Shh, it's oka

, the sobs

till make it to school

home." I forced a weak chuckle, trying to l

said pausing at the door. "

She'd become distant, especially since she began spending all her time with Sasha, a

let it go. But then I found countless pictures of them on Sasha's Instagram, holding each other and smili

sha was grieving her dead sister, who looked just like her, Tiffany explained. That's why she had to "put up with Sasha for a while." But the

best friend with anyone. Not that she couldn't have other friends, but Tiffany was my

*

r the hum of the engine and occas

a familiar complaint. "I wonder if you'l

breakfast might help me loose weight. Then maybe people would stop whisp

and I was gra

me a hopeful smile. "I'll be here after,

move toward the school. I just stood there, watching Dad drive awa

g its age to anyone who cared. I walked reluctantly into the noisy hallway, squeezing

pt b

to my locker without tripping-a small miracle

Tiffany's chirpy

ce quieter t

es shining brighter with every word. She wore a pink mini-skirt that barely covered her, a tight black top straining over her perky chest, a black jacket, and boot

opped to my outfit. "What are you wearing?. Didn't you get my text last night?." She asked with a slightly pan

ur text." I lied

tone was casual, but her words cut deep. I just nodded, saying nothing. Not like I could. Tiffany was right. Maybe I was the pro

erate not to be late for the test. Mr. Frederick wo

Frederick walked in with the last few students. The t

*

dered into the hallway, hoping to catch Tiff

magined dialogue-until my foot caught. A choked groan escaped my lips as I rea

ther did they wear clothes but I'

he feeling of his body beneath my hand made me question every biol

slowing specifically for me, as if i

y close to amusement. As always, he looked like he had stepped straight out of a magazine-wavy dark hair,

smile was directed to me?

ffortless, direct. My heart skipped eight beats