"Elaris," Sela's voice lowered to almost whisper. "This is the third donation this month."
"Caedmon needed it."
"I know, but-" Sela paused. "This is not the issue. Your body cannot produce more of what he takes from it. You are pale. Your pulse is weak. If you tried standing on your feet now, I would not be surprised if you fell."
Elaris offered Sela a small tired smile. "I will not fall."
"You say that every time."
"And it is true every time." Elaris eased herself off the table, making sure her legs would support her before putting full weight on them. "I am fine, Sela. Really."
Sela pursed her lips, but did not say anything else when Elaris started walking toward the door. Over the years, she has learned that there was no arguing with her.
Elaris stayed with her fingers near the wall as she walked, though she did not touch it.
She did not have to.
" Just a bit tired," she thought to herself. "I did not sleep well last night. This is what this is."
Halfway down the corridor, the world started tilting.
Elaris halted her steps and put her palm flat against the stone wall.
"I'm fine," she whispered to herself. "I'm fine, I'm fine-"
Her knees gave out before she was able to finish.
But when she opened her eyes next, Elaris found herself laying on a new table, in a new room, with a blanket covering her up to her chest, and with three healers hovering around her, talking quietly amongst themselves.
"She's awake," one of them said.
Elaris blinked at the light from the ceiling lanterns. "What happened?"
Sela came forward. Her face was unreadable. "You fainted in the east corridor. One of the guards discovered you and brought you here."
"Oh." Elaris tried to sit up. But a hand on her shoulder pushed her back down.
"Don't," Sela said. "Not yet."
"I told you I was tired," Elaris mumbled. "I just need some sleep. I will be more careful-"
"Elaris." Sela exchanged glances with the other two healers standing beside her. "We did a complete examination while you were asleep. There is something you should know."
Elaris's insides twisted. "Is it my heart? Did the donations-"
"You're pregnant."
The words didn't register at once. Elaris gaped up at Sela, as if her leader had suddenly started to speak in another language.
"What?"
"You're pregnant," Sela repeated, a little slower. "From what we can tell, several weeks pregnant."
"That's..." Elaris's voice wobbled. "That's impossible. We have been trying for years. Every healer in this pack has told us it might never-"
"And yet." The stern look on Sela's face changed into something more tender, just a tiny bit. "It happened."
Elaris covered her mouth with both hands. Tears threatened in her eyes, and she let them fall, not bothering to blink them away.
"I'm pregnant," she said, tasting the words in her own mouth. "I'm... Caedmon and I are going to have a baby."
"You need to rest," Sela said, but there was no command in it anymore. "Your body is still recovering from the donation and the fainting. Another thing like pregnancy on top of that-"
"I need to see him." Elaris sat up without caring about how dizzy she felt. "I need to tell Caedmon."
"Elaris-"
"Please, Sela. He needs to know. We've waited so long." Her hands trembled as she pulled the blanket off her legs. "Please."
Sela sighed, but she nodded to the other healers. "Let her go. But someone walks with her."
The smell of medicine and burning herbs filled the air of Caedmon's ward, a familiar smell to Elaris, who no longer paid any attention to it anymore. The healers were checking their monitors and adjusting the feeding tubes that provided him with the stabilizing fluids. Lying motionless under the blanket was Caedmon with a pale face that rose and fell slowly with each breath.
"He hasn't been awake since morning," one of the healers whispered. "His body needed rest after the last donation."
"That is all right," Elaris replied. "I do not require him being awake."
Taking a chair, she sat next to the bed and took his hands in hers. His hands were always cold.
"Caedmon, it is me," she said in a whisper.
He did not respond.
"I understand that you cannot hear me. Maybe you can hear me somewhere, far away. But I needed to say this before anyone else."
Bringing his hand to her cheek, Elaris pressed it there.
"I am pregnant, Caedmon. We will have a baby."
Her voice broke at the end of the sentence. Taking a deep breath, she prepared to continue.
"Remember how many times we tried? How many times the healers have warned us that it will never happen for us but we ignored them saying that we do not care and will try regardless of everything?" she said, smiling from her tears. "You have always wished to have a daughter whereas I wished to have a son just to tease you. I suppose that this time we will see whose wishes become true."
Pressing her forehead to his palm, she continued.
"You have to wake up quickly. I do not wish to celebrate this without you. I want to see your face when I will tell you about it, not like this, not while you are sleeping and I am talking to myself like crazy." Again, she giggled and wiped her cheeks with one hand. "But I could not wait. I needed to say it before anyone else from this pack. It is only you who deserves this."
She sat with him for a little longer, tracing tiny circles over his knuckles while listening to the soft beep-beep of the machines beside his bed.
"Sleep," she said finally. "Get well. And when you open your eyes, I will tell you everything, and we'll celebrate. I promise."
Still holding his hand, Elaris turned when the door opened.
"Elaris."
She turned around. There was one of the senior doctors in the doorway, his face carefully blank as healers made their faces when they didn't wish to scare a patient.
"Doctor Harwin." Elaris got up slowly. "Is there a problem?"
"I need to speak to you in my office," Harwin said. "Please, right away."
Elaris cast another glance back at Caedmon's unchanging form and went out of the room after the doctor, expecting yet another lecture on the importance of getting enough sleep or about her weak constitution.
Doctor Harwin took her into his office and shut the door behind them. He invited her to sit down, but Elaris stayed standing – some intuition told her that she would prefer not to be seated when hearing the coming news.
He stared at her for a few moments, his expression grave.
"Elaris," Harwin said quietly. "There is a problem."