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Chapter 6 6

Word Count: 8405    |    Released on: 28/11/2017

the Rhine, and passed a month of Elysium before they came to L

s, who marries his hero and heroine, and then, instead of leaving them happy for life, and at

"Madam, did the more remarkable events of your life come to you before marriage or after?" Most of them will say "after," and let that be my excuse for treating the marriage of Christopher Staines and R

, and Staines, who was methodical and kept

ent a house, and furnish it, and live in it, until professional income shall flow in an

se adapted to his business. He found three or four at fair rents, neither cheap nor dear, the district being respectable and rather wealthy, but no longer fashionable. He came home with his notes, and found Rosa beaming

cried Rosa,

nation with a singular ardor, drawing their crests back like snakes, and then darting them forward and inflicting what, to the male philosoph

erything; he has just been looking out for a house. Ah! you have got all that over long ago: she has been married six months. Florry, you are handsom

and said, "I dare say you ladies ha

s," sa

and hunt ho

on him, "and such a fine man! Why, he must be six feet. Mine is rat

I want governing a little, and I like it-a

t at Brussels on our wedding tour:

"dearer" and "bett

your house,

ver saw a moire this shade before. I don't care

warded her

has seen one in Portman Street

"It is no use being a physician in those ou

st

general prac., and makes two thousand a year; and he shall call your one in; but he must live in Ma

to have a dear friend: and six months married, and knows thin

s the f

O

g word there was

her topics; and in those intervals, numerous though brief, the lady who had been married six months found time to instruct the matrimonial novice with great authority, and even a shade of pomposity. "My dear,

ust be the best wa

ayfair, and he shows you several, and recommen

t a word. And the train so beautifully shaped! Ah! it is only in Lon

hall, where his gratuitous patients might sit on benches; good dining-room where his superior patients

ver do; a physician must be in

at first starting-and you know they say li

d not yet said the hard word "no" to her, gave in; consoling his prudence with the reflection that, after all, Mr. Cole could

and partner went with them to several places. The rents of houses equal to that i

beyond the mark. "Very well," said t

ing for us. We don't want a large house

u will be sure

them to

r library, which opened on a square yard enclosed. Here were a great many pots, with flowers dead or dying from neglect. On the first floor a fair-

asies. "It is a

ng equal enthusiasm, after his fashion. "You c

he entrance to a mews; the back rooms all look into a mews: we shall have the eternal noise and smell of a mews. My wife's rest will be broken b

ease is property here: the gentleman i

, as boldly as a six years'

kind at a hundred and thirty pound

"The poor patients, wher

," suggested t

id Rosa,

or patients at a time: beggars musn't be choosers; if you give them physic gratis, that is enough: yo

d thenceforward giggled at intervals, wit of this re

rid little Bijou; and then the agent would show them the kitchen, and the new stov

them to eat it-in th

arger places to be had, by a very s

in Harewood Square. "One hundred and thirty poun

othing at all

too much fo

on his arm, with

really cannot give the premium, it is too ridicul

done wit

e a hundred pou

sible,

come and see the house at Harewood Squa

ith your address, doc

es, Morley

hey left

nice little place; and we have

is a great deal fo

oon have made that up to you:

ouse will n

inted, and half inclined to pout. But she vented her feelings in a l

take a good tenant at a moderate loss, than to let the Bijou be uninhabited during the present rainy season. An assignment of the lease-which

dinner was over, and the waiters go

the principal thing. I have saved two hundred pounds,

ose retentive memory had picked up a little of everything, said there were wholesale upholsterers in the City who sold cheaper than the West-end houses, and he thought the best way was to measure the rooms in the Bijou, and go

d Christopher he was the

is the mistake Johnnie and I made; and after that a friend of mine took me to the auction-rooms, and I saw everything sold-oh, such bargains; half, and less than half, their value. She has furnished her house almost enti

, "I should not like my wife

. Staines, they are too full of buying and

et me go with her. Am

n by beginning life in earnest. If you two ladies together can face an auction-room, go by all means; only I

ou come

r the Bijou is a small house; choose your furniture to fit

ale in Oxford Street on Fridays; and the

ful awhile, and at last said to Rosa, "I'll show you I don't

eyes sp

has wounded me deeply; he has wounded me through my wife.

u never showed

kept an affront from you; but

Chri

of many kind acts comes back to me; and I don't know what to do. I

won't hate us forever, if he sees us often. We m

He kissed her, begged her to put on the plainest dress s

rtman Square, Rosa's heart began to quake, and she

d she persuaded Christopher to take h

ed them to employ him in the morning. Dr. Staines declined their services civilly but firmly

listened in cold, satirical silence, and told his wife, in French, to do the same. Notwithstanding their marked disgust, the impudent, in

row," said Christopher, "or I shall h

em to the right-about. S

money and receive the lease of the Bijou, and this and the taking p

nd Mrs. Cole had gon

he table. At the head of this table-full twenty feet long-was the auctioneer's pulpit

, and so evaded the human waves her leader clove. They were importuned at every step by brokers thrusting catalogues on them, wit

er veil, but Mrs. Cole surve

her his catalogue. "No, thank you," said Rosa; "I have one;" and she pr

by their cleanly appearance: the dealers, male or female, were more or less rusty, greasy, dirty, aquiline. Not even the amateurs were brightly d

ur saucepans, two trays, a kettl

or five to a fat old woman in a greasy velvet jacket; blind ind

the auctioneer to his clerk

her dirty hands and nails with innocent dismay. "Oh, what a dreadful creature!" she whispered; "and what can she want with those old rubbishy things? I s

ll you?" sai

and six very neat bedroom chairs were sol

al, and Rosa hazarded a

hat gathered round each lot as it came to the

en," sa

," said t

the broker behind her. "

ly, and addressed herself to Mrs. Cole. "Why should I giv

. However, the broker gave her a very different solution; he said, "The trade always ru

eply, but look

lady; "you had much bet

"you can bid for this

d early and ostentatiously; the article was protected by somebody or other there present, who now of course saw his way c

he wanted was a

ht pounds; then she said,

they are a great bargain;" and bid anothe

give any more. She lost them, accordingly, by good luck

ham, being artful and exciting, and the traitor she employed constantly puffing e

, as they ought to be, on the spot. He signalled a confederate with a hooked nose; the Jew rascal bid agains

bought away like wildfire. In which sport she caught sight of an

Why does he twinkle so? I can see it is at m

eman. Would you believe it? instead of sinking through the f

him, the black eyes twinkled, and Rosa's courage began to ooze away. At last

er asked her for no deposit; her beautiful, innocent, and high-bred face

they

s loiter at the door of a jail, with the order of release in its hand, after six years' confinement. Getting up to go quenches in it the desire to go. So these ladies ha

d leather-and two arm-chairs, for twenty pounds, when, casting his eyes around, he caught sight of Rosa looking at him rather excited.

o," cried

" said the

ith the ha

e hammer,

God, we wa

irmed this pious falsehood, and c

up your mind a little quicker next time, Mr. Isaacs; you have

ock when they reached Morley's. As they came near the door of their sitting-room, Mrs. Staines heard somebody laughing and talking to her husband. The laugh, to her subtle ears, did not sound mus

ied the old gentleman

and felt guilty somehow

r. Staines, "this i

pale by turns; for she had a great

tion-room, sir?" sai

madam.

hing a

but it is not to buy-I enjoy the humors. D

isn't he? Discovered the Ni

of the bargemen. Now there are no bargemen left to speak of; the mantle of Bobby Burton's bargees has fallen on the Jews and demi-semi-Christians that buy and sell furniture at the weekly auctions; thither I repair to hear what little coarse wit is left us. Used to go to the House of Commons; but they are getting too civil by half for my money. Besides, characters come out in an auction. For

began to wor

e another, over their victim's head, and ran everything she wanted up at least a hundred per cent above the

oing to her husband, hiding her hea

of the world all in a moment? If it is my wife you are laughing at, Uncle Philip, let me tell you this is the wrong place. I'

scoundrel five per cent to make you pay a hundred per cent? Why pay a noisy fool a farthing to open his mouth for you when you have taken t

d Christopher, firing up; "because sneering at my R

m very foolish and inexperienced, but I am not so vain as to t

smiled and lo

she found Christopher telling his uncle all about the Bijou, and how he had taken it for a hu

t is a name they gave to a little den in Dear Street, Mayfai

ned. "That is th

the wind to foreign parts less odoriferous. I'd have got you the hole for ninety; but you are like your wife-you must go to an agent. What! don't you know that an agent is a man acting for you with an interest opposed to yours? Employing an agent! it is like a Trojan seeking the aid of a Greek. You needn't cry, Mrs. Staines; your husband has been let in deeper than you have. Now, you are young people beginning lif

, leaving the young couple fi

, "Never mind; experience is worth money, and it always has to be bought. Those who cheat us will die poorer than we shall, if we are honest and economical. I have

married to A MAN. A man sees the best side. I do adore men. Deares

y, you will go to the very next. Only take Uncle Philip's advice, employ no bro

nd thanked him for giving her another trial. So th

y miasma; so he had the drains all up, and actually found brick drains, and a cesspool. He stopped that up, and laid down new pipe drains, with a good fall, and properly trapped. The old drains were hid

pense one avoids by buying at a shop, and the broker claimed his shilling in the pound. This, however, Staines refused. The man came and blustered. Rosa, who was there, trembled. Then, for the first time, she saw her husband's brow lower; he seemed transfigured, and looked terrible. "You scoundrel," said he,

the law,

he seized him with a grasp so tremendous that the fellow

ngry Hercules, and the man was literally whirled out of sight with a rapidity and swiftness almost ludicrous; it was like a trick in a pantomime. A cl

, and his eyes like hot coals; but his wife threw her tend

embling li

rgot YOU, in my righteous indignation." Next he became uxorious. "Did they frighten her, a d

gy. "You must not think that I am passionate; on the contrary, I am always practising self-government. My maxim is, Animum rege qui nisi paret imperat, and that m

e you in a passion; you are so terrible, so beautiful. Ah! they are

sweetness; the sensitive cheek that pales or blushes at a word, the bo

you admire, is it?

istopher, not seeing

a Simpleton, that is all. And

sale-room. Mrs. Staines remembered all Uncle Philip had said, and went plainly dressed; but her friend decline

l shown on the table, and the dirt choked, and poisoned our fair friends. Brokers pestered them, until at last Rosa, smarting under her late exposure, addressed the auctioneer

dness, uttered these words, she little foresa

her. "What business have these dirty fellows, without a shilling in

of in the papers again a

ve as well as you?"

ady. Why, she'd give you in charge of

wnright clamor of d

s, and pestered him. "Aah damned 'em pretty hard," said he, "but they didn't heed any. So then ah spoke 'em civil, and ah said, 'Well, lads, I dinna come fra Yorkshire to sit like a dummy and let you buy wi' my brass; the first that pesters me again ah'll just fell him on t' plaace, like a

at will not do. I will have no dis

gentleman reminded the auctioneer that the journ

, stand behind that lady's chair, and if anybo

to let soon," said a voic

gay or grave at a moment's notice, "is supported by th

rd. "I do my own business; but

sale you may put up the shutters; we have gone and offended Mr. Ja

one or two lots, an

looking her way, and

ittle out of spite; but as he had only got half a crown a

deep mourning. His appearance interested Rosa, and she wondered how he came there, and why; he looked like a lamb wedged in among wolves, a flower among weeds. As

excellent and useful article. Should not be

gh," said Jacobs,

dealers.-"

t down; shows they are going to bid for it in earnes

shillings; but the moment he said "Five pounds to begin," the boy in black lifted up his childish treble and bid thus, "Five pound ten"-"six pounds"-"six pound ten

use of amazement, and th

little

say his l

rd, sir. You are a gen

? If it's worth ten,

e you go on like that? Why, there was no one bid against y

sold, and mamma said it would break her heart to lose it. She was too ill to come, so she sent me. She told me I was not to let it be sold away from

osts money," said M

hen. "Have YOU got any on hand?

sudden she looked down the table, and there was Uncle Philip, twinkling as b

last she mustered courage, wrote on a leaf of her pocket-book, and passed

g you up himself. Follow his eye when he bids; you w

and found tha

nd, with her expressive face,

him, as you see he has a fancy for certain articles, y

suite Rosa wanted; but the auctioneer bid ag

ou, madam," said

e only bidder, and you have been so kind

ted with a roar of Homeric laughter that literally shook the

your mutton

the word

on't you want a bro

ime, sir; I'll do

nhorns l

ten-pund note for her

l, if it's stuffe

he owner's name and the res

a psalm at

please," said the auctioneer, who had

inst the wall, and Rosa had set her heart upon it. Nobod

own

nds," sa

about to be knocked down to Rosa, when suddenly a new bidder arose in the broker Rosa had rejected

riend, the snipe-nosed woma

hed the note. "Six

x-t

ev

en-t

ig

ht-t

nning, stealing a sudden glance, caught her friend l

en po

elv

irt

urt

xte

ght

ent

ty gu

ing suddenly round to Mrs. Cole, with a magnificen

ose and st

Mrs. Cole followed her, a

thing I have bid for. There I'v

t that. You had only to tell me you wanted it. I wo

said. Florence,

employ the very rogue she had turned off. But it is my own fault. Cecil

x. Only just married, and going about lik

ke two vagabonds. We have

a sta

dvice, you false-

are a

se; you are

have anything

should, you tre

nt-insolent

despi

hated you

pretended to lov

no more. I am you

e told the truth fo

in your husband; so you may lea

madam. We can get

, with eyes that g

ut of that; and presently in came Uncle Philip, full of the humors of the auction-room. He told about the little boy with a delight that disgusted M

of mine. We are

iends till death," sai

quired wh

John

Curzon

es

ve quarrell

es

usband is a gene

a trai

put a good deal of mone

p it. She is

elled with her abou

and her base good-for-n

our. "Good afternoon, Mrs. Chr

r," said he, "matrimony is a blunder at the best; and you have not done

ome here to insult us, I hope i

leasure, si

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