The source? Well, my life went to shit a long time ago but if I have to pin my troubles on someone, that would be my step-father, Alpha Eric. Being the head alpha means that his every word is law, and my life is a mere plaything in his hands, something he can manipulate and ruin. I loathed him with all being, but I also feared him; he's the one who controls my life ultimately, not me. He allows me to stay in the basement of the house where my family used to live; sometimes, I can't help but think about the happy times I spent living in the main house when my father was still alive. But I make do with the basement; it's better than being homeless, so I am grateful for whatever I have.
I can't complain, because complaining means being beaten even more than ever. As the omega 'runt' of the pack, I invite more trouble than anyone else, but for things beyond my control, it ends with being punished by alpha Eric. There are several things that I can't control, one of them being the group of sassy girls who have made it their life mission to make my life a living hell. They have made it their life mission to ostracize me, to make me feel worthless. And it works. They tease me for being omega and being weak. When their parents or other adults find out about our fights, which are more like one-sided attacks from bullies, who is the scapegoat? Me. Of cos am the scapegoat.
There was a time when I tried arguing back. Tell the alpha that I wasn't the one in the wrong, that it had all been a misunderstanding. But my words fell on deaf ears, and the beating that came with it. I've learned my place in the pack, the bottom of the barrel. I've learned to keep my head down, to be submissive, and not to talk back.
I was not in school despite being seventeen. I had to drop out because Alpha Eric said he didn't want to buy school supplies or required textbooks. I must do whatever he tells me, and I can't disobey him. I am not allowed to be like other kids.
I hear other kids complain about school stuff and am envious of them; they get to complain about the life I am dreaming about, they get to run around the school halls, complain about classes, and even how they hate and skip out of P.E. classes. They have parents who listen to their rambling, provide food for them, and love them unconditionally. Alpha Eric never feeds me, I have to steal scraps to eat because he would kill me if he noticed any food missing from the freezer. He is all I have, my legal guardian, to be exact, now that my parents are gone. He is the closest thing to a father figure I have, but our relationship is nothing like that of a father and daughter relationship. He beats me more than he ever loved me; I can't even say that he loves me; I think he just tolerates me.
Today, I'm alone in the house cleaning as usual. I can barely keep my eyes open, so tired after not being able to sleep all night cause of the nightmares; I can scarcely catch any sleep because of my night terrors; they are so horrible that I wake up from each nightmare jerking awake, gasping for breath. In times like this, I just long for someone to be here, to hold me as I cry. But my parents are long gone and there's no one now.
I eye the nice, big, comfortable bed that Alpha Eric sleeps in greedily; I fantasize about how comfortable it would be to lay down on it, sink into the soft mattress, and nap. As I tried to concentrate on cleaning, the temptation to lay on the bed grew. It lasted a few minutes before my eyes fluttered closed, and I almost fell asleep while standing. All right, just a quick nap, I decide, letting fatigue wash over me. Usually, I would dread the thought of sleeping, but right now, my body is demanding it. I plop down on the bed, my small frame not taking up to 1/5 of the bed.
I feel hunger, but exhaustion overpowers the hunger and I'm out like a baby. I don't know how long I slept, but I was soon roughly awakened. My eyes open as am thrown off the bed by my hair. You stupid bitch, do you think I let you stay in my house to sleep on my bed? Roared Alpha Eric as he glared down at me. I try to stammer out an apology. "I-I'm sorry, alpha I say while trying to keep my tears away. You be sorry to be the time am done with you, he snarls pulling the belt. The sight fills me with dread. I try to run, but he pulls me by my hair, throwing me on the floor.
He gives me a cold glare as he raises the belt, and I scream as it touches my body, running on adrenaline. I try to fight back, my first mistake; this action fills him with rage as he holds me by my neck. Am going to kill you, he roars; as I look into his eyes, it is filled with murderous intent, and I know he means it. I try to crawl away from him; I fight back, looking for anything to fight back with. In one last attempt to get away, I touch a vase of some sort. With all my might, I bring it down on his head smashing it with all my strength. He lets out an ear-shattering howl, the blow isn't enough to deter him. I scramble on my feet, fleeing the room, I run into the wood, feeling the cool air on my skin. I shift into my wolf, and my paws meet the dirt. My head is throbbing like crazy, but I need to get away because if I am caught, Alpha Eric will finish what he started.