BABY MAFIA - [comedy]

What...is this?

A girl stood in front of a full-body mirror. She stared at her reflection with wide eyes. Her hands were trembling. Disbelief washed her soft face.

Is this...me?

No.

"This...isn't my real body!" The girl cried, and her soft, coy voice echoed in the medieval-styled room.

Strangely, the room was decorated with many baby toys, and the interior was so childish that an adult would be embarrassed to enter.

That's right. It was a room for a baby.

"This can't be. Is this…" The girl bit her lips. Tears started to fill her eyes as snots dripped down her nose.

Is this the famous transmigration….isekai-ed?

The girl had a chill down her spine at the thought. She wanted to slap her cheek, yet she couldn't bear to harm the plump cheek of the girl's face in front of the mirror.

No, it's not a girl. It's not even a little girl.

It's a toddler.

"I am...isekai-ed?" The girl– the toddler, gasped. The tears accumulated at the edge of her eyes increased. Her body shook hard, and her eyes reddened.

If someone were here, they would see the image of a toddler who was about to cry.

"F– " the girl was about to say a word.

F*ck? Frick? Fuh– fck you mothercker?

"F– " the girl took a deep breath as she prepared her heaven-shattering shout.

"FANTASTIC!!"

….

If anyone were here, they would shout at the sight of a toddler screaming with her face flushing red. The toddler jumped lightly as a blossoming smile filled her face.

"Yes, yes, I did it! I'm isekai-ed! I'm transmigrated! Ah, ah! That shabby, suspicious magic scroll I buy for $200 is working!" The girl suddenly collapsed to the floor and rolled back and forth, not caring about her dignity.

What's dignity? Can it be eaten? Bah!

"Ah, ah. Finally. Finally!" The girl giggled as if she was possessed.

She tried to calm her beating heart, yet it was hard. She was panting hard while hugging her body, treating it as if it was the most important thing in the world.

"Uh, my body. My new body! Ahhh, you are so cute!"

The girl drooled over her own appearance as she approached the mirror. She put her small hand on the mirror and slowly stroked her silky hair.

"Light purple bob hair? Owaaa it's sparkling. Wow, wow, so soft!"

The girl admired her hair yet stopped touching her hair that only reached the back of her neck. She then dragged her small hands to touch the edge of her eyes instead.

A pair of large blue eyes resembling the colour of the sea, deep yet pure without sin was staring at the mirror.

"Are these really my eyes? Surely it's not a jewel…."

The girl was impressed as she moved her chubby fingers to touch her nose.

"Small nose...but why does it look so haughty? Ugh, this can't be a villainess, right?"

The girl grumbled and started to move to touch her face and cheeks.

Snow white skin, plump and soft just like a mochi. She tried to pinch her cheek, and it bounced lightly.

Owaaa so puffy! Fluffy! This is really my body?

The girl still couldn't believe her eyes. She kept trying to touch her face, and this time– her short fingers touched her lips.

Small pink lips like a scattered sakura petal. Plump and fresh, reminding people of the warm spring.

Beautiful. Cute. Charming.

These three words couldn't fully describe the girl shorter than an adult's knees.

Anyone would be thrilled having such a beautiful and charming face–

If only it's not a baby.

Yet the girl didn't care.

"Hum...hum...this...is..." The girl mumbled for the second time. Her voice and pronunciation were clear, unfitting to the body's characteristic.

I have become a baby.

The girl gulped.

But, so what?

Even if this body is a baby, it doesn't matter. I have succeeded!

Now, I'll be treated like those cute protagonists in manhwas. I'll have a doting hot daddy, a few overprotective handsome brothers and the male lead will fawn over me.

Yes. This is it. I finally escaped those dull days studying online in college.

The girl curled her lips. She was so excited that she almost kissed her reflection on the mirror.

"You, this body's original soul. Don't worry! I'll take care of your body and be happy for your sake. You can rest in peace. I'll revenge those who harm you and lead you to a new world!"

The girl swore dramatically in front of the mirror. She clenched her fists, and her blue eyes shone.

Those days studying manhwas and its strategies are finally not in vain. I'll stand on top of the world and be the loved protagonist!

The girl opened her small mouth and lifted her head. Bell-like laughter rang throughout the room.

"MWAHAHAHA! All of you, just wait! This me, the great me, will be at the top of this world. I'll conquer everyone and be the best!"

The girl was laughing like she's crazy. She covered her left eye and winced in pain–

Artificial pain.

"Ahhh, the power sealed in my left eye. Don't worry. Soon, your existence will be revealed to the world. It's time. Yes, the time has come for a protagonist of the world."

The toddler had a dark smile on her face as she slowly uncovered her blue eyes while enduring her illness.

Yes, she's terminally ill. It's a curse that can't be lifted.

The curse of a chuunibyou*.

_________

*Chūnibyō is a colloquial term typically used to describe early teens who have delusions of grandeur, who so desperately want to stand out that they have convinced themselves they have hidden knowledge or secret powers.

But the girl didn't realise her illness as a last stage of a chuunibyou.

Instead, she took a deep breath and slowly plopped down in front of the mirror.

She couldn't be rash in this new world. She had to be careful to be the protagonist.

Now, let's see the first rule of transmigration.

The girl closed her eyes.

I have to retrieve the memory of the original body.

The girl was already experienced dealing with bizarre things like what she experienced now. She quickly used her knowledge of manhwas to anticipate her next action.

Yes, come. Give me the memories of this body. I'll have to know what novel or manhwa I entered. Or maybe it's a brand new world– ah, no. Protagonists usually enter a novel or a manhwa they have read.

Which one is it then? What genre? I read both male and female lead books. Surely this should be the doting dad troupe judging from this body's baby appearance, right?

The girl excitedly waited for the throbbing pain to assault her head. She then would endure it while organising this body's memory. After that, she would know which novel or manhwa she transmigrated into.

Once she knew, the knowledge of the book would naturally be her biggest strength. Her effort to jot down all the novel and manhwa plots she knew would come in handy.

"Hm, good. This is good. Well-planned." The girl was proud of herself. Her smile reached her ears as she waited for the memories to come.

1 minute.

Her eyes felt heavy.

2 minutes.

She wanted to snooze off, but she endured.

5 minutes.

Her head was fine. There's no assaulting pain whatsoever. But the sleepiness was such a great force grabbing her mind.

10 minutes.

She already sprawled on the white marble floor, drooling.

"Oh, my, the young miss is sleeping." The voice of a woman suddenly sounded as someone in a maid uniform approached the baby on the floor. She quickly lifted the toddler and placed her on a cradle.

There was a pained smile on her face.

"Young miss...what to do…" The maid sobbed, yet she lowered her voice in fear of the baby waking up. She held her breath and slowly left the room with one last whisper.

"Young miss, we will protect you. Even if the boss abandoned us. Please...be happy."

Clack.

The wooden door was closed.

Silence filled the room. The only sound existing was the sound of the baby's weak breath.

Fuh...fuh…

I'm screwed.

The girl broke in a cold sweat as she slowly opened her eyes. She immediately turned around and looked over at the door direction.

Fck. Fck. Fck. What's going on? What went wrong? Why didn't I receive any memories?

The girl sat down on the cradle and hit her own bed with her short legs.

What is this?! I don't even know this body's name! Is it the same as my name, Ainsworth? Or is it something different? Where is this? What novel did I enter? Or is it a manhwa?

Why– why don't I get any memories from this body?!

"Ah!!" The little baby with purple bob-cut hair kicked the air. She crumpled her tiny pink uniform and even had the urge to pee on her diaper.

Is it a bug? Is this a mistake? Why don't I even know anything about this world? Where's the promised memory and knowledge of the world? Where's the superior cheat called the memory of the world inside a novel?

Ainsworth had the urge to roll down the cradle and chased after the maid.

What to do?!

She was shaken. The only trump card she held, the memories of this body, wasn't here. She was left alone without prior knowledge of the world she would live from now on.

Go to hell with trying to go back to her world. It's not worthy. But…but…

"Without the host body's memories...how can I know which novel I enter? How can I reign over this world as the protagonist? What if I'm the villainess or even worse– "

The mob character?

Ainsworth felt like dying.

No. No. My effort to be isekai-ed can't end like this. I can't give up just because I don't know anything.

Ainsworth clenched her fists. Her face showed the determination of someone who wasn't a toddler at all. It was a strange sight of an adult's eyes over a toddler's body.

"Yes, calm down. I can do this. If I don't know anything, I have to know something. Time to find out." Ainsworth climbed the cradle and slowly slid down. Once her butt touched the ground, she sighed in relief.

I am adapting fast to this toddler's body. It's not that difficult. Is it because this body can walk? The difference is just the change in view and strength.

Ainsworth tugged her lips. She trotted to the door with her small legs. The distance to the door was just three steps using an adult's legs.

It's tripled for a toddler.

"Haa...ha...fah. Why is it so far?!" Ainsworth almost bit her tongue as she clung to the bottom of the door. The baby plopped down again and sighed.

I need to recover my strength. But this is a toddler. It's impossible. In the first place, I should have a local maid that I can rely on and order around.

Remembering the basics of most transmigrated protagonists, Ainsworth vowed to get a loyal maid that would be her hand and feet. After that, gaining basic information would be easy.

"But…" Ainsworth paused as she peeked over the small hole between the door gap.

She was annoyed by one thing.