: A Lonel

ra

kept

give a damn. The city lights blurred together through the tears streaming down my fac

ed my ankle, making me stop dead in my tracks. I hobbled up onto the sidewalk

n I jus

around my legs as sobs tore from my che

care how I looked. The hurt wa

my head, each one a litt

thing just twisted my gut into a sickening knot. I bur

man I loved, the man I thought lov

the sidewalk. It could have been minutes or

in a nearby store window made me recoil. My cheeks were red and pale white, my eyes

s as lovely

d buildings and shining softly against the night. Couples stroll h

ut the shop windows with all their silly holiday trimm

t lone

mach, the new wave of

ee weeks

s going to tell him in the Maldives at Christmas, make it spe

en I would say to him that he was going to be a father. I pictured him picking

ed like some ki

mach. The only thing that kept me from falling apart, th

did he cradle me so lovingly, whisper what sou

w I realized it was good-bye. He'd been giving me that o

y eyelids close. His betrayal cut me up m

I didn'

ts I went in those few hours. My suitcase trailed b

led overhead, casting everything in a soft, golden light. Street vendors wer

g, harmonized voices floating through the cr

ren pointing excitedly at mechanical reindeer and life-size snowmen.

s bea

r me,

ked, was a life I felt I'd los

h romance and happiness. I had thought David and I would take long, romantic

was. Alon

My throat was burning, and there was a great wei

ing to. I just kept going, my

s, No missed calls or Even Messages. I laughe

er, Lisa. I looked at it th

ne, voicing the words out loud. But the pain came ag

ice came out w

? Are you okay?" Lisa's voice w

er care undid

cheated, Lisa. He's been cheating on me for a year. A whole

th incredulity and anger. "That son of a bitch! I swear to god, Sara,

laugh, but it turne

tears making my voice shake. "He said I

's a piece of garbage, Sara. You're better than him. Yo

oft enough to penetrate the w

e loved me,"

n like him don't know what love is. He isn't

. My eyes b

ve to get out of here. Get out of everything. Go someplace whe

face with my sleeve. "W

ldives. Enjoy the vacation, even if it's by you

les and honeymooners made my chest tighten. "I don't know,

etter off you are without him. You'll remember what it f

ugh the air, through

did need to get away, escap

the air biting against my lungs.

light. Pack your bags. And promise me you won't

she could not see

ur trip, which I had booked for David and me. The Maldives

there was a flight to my d

ened once I confirmed

ing, and I

taxi, my suitcase

" I said, my voi

curb. As the city lights began to blur past the win

ng, and maybe the pain will st

nly if I knew this trip will