ears

n the page of the book I'm reading to find the nex

gically appear like the details of a Polaroid picture exposed to light and air. When they don't, I accept m

oing to end up together now, and I'll be heartbroken if they don't. It's just so mean. And yet, I have to admit it's also pure genius. It's just like when you're watching a movie, and you hate the villain

it com

k. Next year? I have to wait tha

If only I had someone to talk to about this book, I'd p

ook is not having anyone to discuss it w

ew friends back in New York an

had the time. I usually have to stay at the office until late at night. Even when I don't, I'm on the phone or the computer or by Shawn's side nearly every m

to rest gives me an extra boost of energy so I can stay u

he family photo in the red frame — my dad, my mom and me

frame and pu

would lose them at a young age since

too, so they did their best to prepare me, to make sure I co

wasn't

ughter again even though I'll never forget the sound of it. He

up late studying or when she knew I'd had a bad day. More than anything, I just wish they were still here so I could talk to them. so that I could tell the

something about the silence and the shadows of the night that

with a lump in my throat. Then I see

one since

, experiences I want to remember, thoughts I need to process or emotions I just ne

ff and find a blank page. Then I take th

rough the air of loneliness that fills my

but my apartment. Maybe in a Greek seaside to

. Someone to wrap their arms around me

e forehead I can kiss, whose tiny fingers I can wrap around one of mine. I'm not sure I'll make a good mother, but I know I

h me in all the magical ways a woman wants to be touched. He'll pin my hands above my head and demand my surrender with his mouth, claiming my