to a whole new city knowing no one while pregnant, and cried herself to sleep every day as the paisas too much. She is even considering aborting the thing she's carrying because s

nking too many times. I have

o pin the pregnancy on... if only you knew how many times I tried to take abortion pills for this thing inside of me. I have no love of it, it doesn't excite me that much I'

ix my braids and search for my bag... I can't find it and I'm worried. I can't even see with blinking

on my way out. I have no idea where I'm at but it's the

corner. There's a busy road down. It's Saturday morning

'll turn somewhere I can sit and have coffee. >It's the township and no one can tell I'm not from arou

tly. It's fear of walking a silent st

he sounds beaten more than upset. He'

the shirt, and got

s like he is a

at got anything

talk but I looked for you and you took your phone and walked out… you barely know

t. I feel lost and alone, it hurts. So bad. I find the name of the street

and the back of a school. Please com

t pausing and I stand on the sidew

ible. My left hand starts to shake violently… children are playing in the park, kids always wake up at the earliest of time to play, and th

. He's the only person I'm close with who has an e

ont of me and gets out

ak down and cry.

, Lisa." H

in I feel. I can't scream because if I do, the p

t I simply took two steps back. I miss

ens the car door

and I feel the warm liqu

buckles my seat belt a

othing is playing,

en me to

s totally quiet, I walk

tears, I'm in pain and it's taking all of my energy. I miss them but I know they're never coming back. I

lks in and climbs to the bed. He pulls

me, Lisa, what can I do

s are noticeable like he's keeping his cries inside. We both know

to you Lisa. W

and look at him. He n

me forget. I need to feel pleasurable pain... and I need it slo

for his lips with mine an

old back

hurt each other

ch other. It's wh

them, his fingers dig in and I moan in

exhales and

er and moan loud near his

a line we know we sh

*

to lose my breath. We're both gasping and holding hands that we're at

d that's where I learned to take care of myself mentally. I've gone to war; I've killed and I've had my people killed

This is the same line of work that kept her when she was in university. I have no problem with her but I'll have no one disrespect what I do and t

o check if I am

nothing special or beyond wo

ial in you. There's ever

e bullshit that I'm beyond words. I'm