BECOMING MY EX'S SURROGATE

eyes are overflowing pools of tears. I can't even see well despite the orange lanterns il

has it be

r d

en nor stepped out of this room. For days of pure crying, moaning, but not even all that crying has been able

ered barricades of my heart - dreadful lull. Silence. And it sucks! It stings! It is banging all the corners of this house and surging

d if there really is someone perched on the throne of h

light. Now this rhymes my actual state - my whole entirety is clogged with dearness.

the darkness, wandering to the

aves sta

tears

tings

rgy leaves

ng to the misty gras

is all gone -

is cruel! Everything

hell. Being the only sibling I ever had, I felt like a part of me died with him. I felt so alon

know. He was bound to marry someone of his pedigree, and I was not even a shadow to match his class. I was cognizant of that fact from day one of our relationship, but the flames of love that were burning us made me believe that it would burn all barriers blockin

and leave me so empty a

for my sweet child. I could foresee how cute it would be, and how great it would become in the future. The news of my baby felt like divine completion. I couldn’t have asked for anything more. But all the doors to my dreams were slammed shut to my face in

t back then, but it was a feeling that made me blackout, only to wake

even know how I pulled through that shit, but all credits go to my sweet parents. They stood with me through it all for thos

. I was still bleeding heavily, and I believed that the heavens could see that and spare me from another pain. But as the screw that life is, it was t

y mother beat the monstrous disease drove me to doing some things that I, myself, am not so proud of. But I had to, because what else was I supposed to do when everyone left me when bills started accruing? Nobody ever wants to be burdened. They say you only know your true friends when you are

or my prayers were worth anything. Because just a week before today, my mother breathed her last. In front of my ey

ng to call mine. Even the house that is serving as my roof right now isn't mine anyone. I mortgaged it in the

ish that the heavens could take me to where all these three

had e

ed p

ve pe

erve