LONE

A G

TAU

TH PI

AN H

ETH

AL

Thing. He giveth the house a "finished" lo

d is an adornment like unto a

as a certificate of respectability; yea in the eyes o

table as a centerpiece, and more impressi

ad thee into dim and draughty corners, but shall run nimbly

taurant looketh pitiful; but an

ee a room upon the air-shaft; and the bell-boys shall answer thy ring with

ng "Send this thing to Mrs. Jones", the

h an easy mind, knowing thou canst have no designs upon them. Thy famil

indest thine husband less them thine

have every other luxury in all the world,

PTE

sband, who c

e is far abo

ceth in him, and he shall h

th his hands and bringe

ff the dumbwaiter. He starteth the kitchen range. He

his moneys, and upon the seventh doeth

runneth the lawn mow

he parlor curtains and p

s dresses up the bac

th the cat

afraid o

arpet, and his cigarette burn

his smoking o

ing socks and sewet

t doeth him

d with his wife he donneth a

s filled with praises for his wife's cooking. He doth not expect chicken sala

Club, by the fit of her gowns and her imported hats. He luncheth meagrely upon

s and noteth her new frock. And the

ot the existenc

rusted to m

met in the world, bu

ll seen him-i

TER

Lord maketh a man-but t

erial whereon a woman putt

d him like unto a shop-made garment, which must be trimmed over and c

nd many unnecessary pleats in his temper, and many

l shall with difficulty select that which fitteth her disposition and matcheth her tastes-even that whic

y another hand. And these are easy to acquire. Yet an hand-me-down may have been spoiled

er speeches shop-worn. His manners shall require much basting and his morals many patches. The gloss hath been rubbed off his illusions

the best of that which she getteth. Verily, verily, an husband is a work of art whic

TER

te! For no woman with brains hath ever pl

e woman to possess both real

husband is but an adjunct; and

ngs, and unto him a woman that know

teth a man as a mosquito that buzzeth thr

as a cold bath on a winter

th of a woman horrifieth a man even a

s more uncanny than a pet parrot which saith the appr

st thou know of one clever woma

mind, one opinion, and one throne in an househ

soever thou receivest in the love game

d from the grave; whether it be a left-over bachelor, or an hand-me-dow

eason when she yearneth for sentiment, and neither the love

an husband is more to be desired

as spaghetti without sauce and mor

the Lemon which Fate awardeth thee

o be despised; and even an Highbrow shall find an h

TER

to marry for a change; and the lawyers delight in

ny varieties of men, there

times seven times, he maketh

eth a second time, rep

rom his words, neither from the cloves upon his breath, nor the ardor of his

as another's, and one man's l

as another's, and one man's e

like unto another,

like unto anothe

ke unto another, whe

other without a collar, and as w

on the carpet, and leaveth his stub

orning, and in the newspapers in the evening, a

ning growl, and celebrateth the Sunday

ising; but matrimony is a chemical which transmuteth27 each and every one of them from a lover into

re is this differen

irst maket

maketh th

ird maketh

LA

HE CUSH

EAD,

TOOL

AND FE

E CHAFI

HE FRU

OOKING