tta

st time in a we

ythm of the bout, the dance of advance and retreat, the sharp clang of met

just moved. Side to side. Back and forth. Al

time, I w

my breathing, my temper, my impulse to lunge without thinking. And n

n of a second. Just long enou

ung

clean on the ches

y mask, grinni

d up at me. His expression didn't change. But something in

n," h

r. And for the first

than me. Still faster. Still smarter. But I was keeping

hard but smiling. "That was good

his foil. "It

I scored s

x points becau

ded from my

till rely on speed instead of strategy. You scored because I allowed you

r flare. "Then

learned anything." He walked towar

at suppose

oked at me with those

oal is to win. It's not. The goal is to understand. To control. To master yo

t am I r

oy with a bro

, foil in hand, chest heavin

o practice th

ded to study. Because I had better things to do than waste

Darius had made me feel like a child playing dress-up. L

my bed. I stared at the wal

hat he couldn't stand seeing someone with real talent, real potential, real gr

othing

s be

walked into the gym

us wasn'

hair and a face that looked like it had seen too many disappointments. He was st

be Jackson

are

rogram here." He looked me up and

om

rrison. Your counselor. The other

ened. "What

ego the size of Texas." Miller smiled, but it didn't reach his ey

hat to say. So

You show up to practice. You follow my rules. You respect your teammates. And you keep

want to be par

why you're not fulfilling your extracurricular re

eed this team. I didn't need anyone. But I remembe

said. "I'l

s. "Practice starts in ten minutes. Yo

e bleachers

was twelve and a boy who moved like he was afraid of his own shadow.

hey t

each other when they failed. They celebrated when they succeeded. They

t under

mpeted together. But we didn't care about each other. We cared a

cared about

eak. It was everything I'

d

tirred in my chest. Something I didn't

gave me a nod and followed them. I stayed o

e sat down

gh d

ger. She had her tablet in he

ay," I

not ve

a nice

something on her tablet. "You know, for someone who thinks he's the b

lare. "What's your

with you. I have a pro

a problem with

ying to make people hate you." She looked up.

re what peo

so terrified of being judged that you've decided to be the judge first. To make peopl

king. I didn't know if I wanted to

me?" I said. "You don't

you're

not s

g here alone instead of

have an

. Who was told he was better than everyone else. Who believed it? And now that he's not the be

away. I did

nt home and foun

n her hands, tears streaming down her fac

hat hap

Her eyes were red. He

my job,"

ike a punch to the

s. They said it's nothing personal. They said they're sorry."

at to do. My mom had worked at that hospital for twelve years. She'

e going to

savings. It'll last a few months. But after tha

what ca

o drop out of school. I'd have to get a job. I'd have

"I'll get a job. I'll

should be focused on

t fu

he air between us.

st time, I understood

de what you're w

. I'd thought I was untouchable.

s wr

to the gym and told Coach Mil

he dark circles under my eyes.

You're not going to be the star here. You're going to be

derst

eck. You're going to have to respect your teamm

derst

t for a moment.

id. "Let's see w

pulled down a foil. I

I saw L

th a smile that didn't reach his eyes. He was tall. Blond. Perfect.

id. "The one from Westbrook. Th

are. I took a breat

CJ,"

nd deliberate. "Everyone knows who you are. The qu

bet

dened. "We'll

d down a foil, and stepped o

ler said. "Jackson versus Van

foil. Leo

e," Mill

n Leo a