rid

t was mandatory for all staff, which meant I had spent the entire day dreading it while pretending to care about disch

only formal thing I owned, and I kept smoothing my palm over the fabric as if I could somehow make it look more expensive by sheer force of will. The

stage, soft and tasteful, the kind of music rich people used to make themselves feel generous. Along the walls, banners for St. Jude Medi

ridic

e-hour shifts that turned into sixteen without warning. But a ballroom full of wea

essert table and whispered, "You look

" I ha

. I should have joined them. I should have tried to look like I belonged. Instead, I stayed in the co

ook the stage and tapped the microp

hank you for joining us tonight in support of St. Jude Medical Cent

litely. I lowered m

the hospital's partnership with several military medical units. I hea

nce of Mr. Alonso, whose continued suppor

, sharpened, becoming something c

ened around the

oked

e he

e a black tuxedo, severe and perfect, the jacket cut across his shoulders as if it had been built for him alone. He looked even m

. The men around him watched him carefully. Not like colleagues. Not like friends. M

the hospital. No rank. No ins

did not kno

eyes fo

seemed

, invisible and safely ignored. The next, Alonso was looking at me as if the

through my chest. I

ealizing they were doing it. Conversations faltered as he passed. A woman in emerald silk turned to

ed only

the glass down, to do something normal. Instead, I stood there like pr

re field of vision. The scent of cedar and pine reached

beautiful,

carried in the noise of the ballroom, but

y breath hitching. "T

intense enough to feel like touch. I hated that my cheeks

e this,"

ed. "Ex

the donors, the chandeliers, the champagn

d it. That would ha

being stared at by people who think compassion

his mouth. Not quite

ance wi

That doesn't sound

e said. "It is

out hi

himself from touching my face in Emiliano's room. The restraint in his body. The tension

that's a good

d softly. "It

my car, the way he had watched me in the trauma bay, the fact tha

the sensible choice, I

s closed a

onto the dance floor as the quartet shifted into something slow and melancholy. Couples moved around u

n any obvious way, and yet I had the absurd feeling that if the ceiling coll

ody close enough to unsettle me but never close enough to trap

fraid of m

"You make tha

kened. "And

ance in front of h

ld have

tri

e low. "You warned your

looked past his shoulder, toward the glittering crowd, but there

u doing thi

nci

t do

barely a movement. "Because when you wa

eath

y the warmth of his hand, the dark focus of his eyes, and the impossible feeling t

ed me more t

stant. Alonso kept his hand on my waist for one second too long. Not

" I whispered,

rgument. No command. Only that same controlle

d," he

not hav

I

n run from the room," he sa

ammed again

and men with expensive watches. I didn't look back until I reached the

ection in the mirror. My hair had loosened around my face.

recognize

ening to me?"

. I pressed a hand to my chest, trying to steady my breathing, but my

us. Ter

e