h's

nfocused, as if the world were still soft and blurred around the edges

rough the files again. His fingers moved slowly, and deliberately. He was counting the

rd, my throat

tclothes, hot and sharp against my skin. With every breath

ooking up from the box. "You were o

. "I told you, Sean. I couldn't sleep. I felt d

he was searching my mind. I dropped my eyes deliberatel

too much," I added, forcing a small, t

long and frightening. Sean stood up s

it didn't sound like his usual reassurance. To me,

One thing struck me with terrifying clarity: if he found it on me, there would be no seco

ids. He might even kill me without hesitation, co

losed the lid with a sharp snap. The sound made me flinch. Then he c

catch my bus for the business trip. Just take car

ive suitcase, zipping it shut with a sharp pull. He didn't touch me. No kiss.

his boots on the floor, the front door s

ft, and I lay there for a moment, just breathing. The

about me, nor the kids. He only cared about meeting Valerie in the lav

g faces. Sean's arm around her, then I felt it-the chill spreading in my c

! my mind screame

reality. I quickly pushed the photo deeper under my pill

, Mom. I..."

ed, her little lip trembling. "We said goodbye

ren were being ignored by their father because he was too busy living a doub

like ash in my mouth. I forced a smile, avoiding their eyes. "

with us today?" Looking up at me with his big, thoughtf

But the man I'd given seven years of my life to didn't. Sean didn't even look at me long enough to noti

ears. I tried to hold them back, but

realized I was crying. Lily lifted her small, soft hand and gently wiped a

re about to cry too. Ethan looked at me, his eyes shining with tears now.

oy," I said, my voice cracking. I hated lying to them, but they were too young for the truth. "My boss

used and glance

to be smiling, not crying," Ethan sa

d. "Good news means

ng them both into a hug. "I'm just so happy to be with you. We

make pancakes with the littl

d. "We'll do eve

e. Their little bodies were warm against mine, and I held them close, feel

d cut throu

Bzzz

the room. My gaze went to the small table beside the bed, and my

r phone on the table

tered, jumpin

?" Ethan asked,

e," I said, reaching

my breath catching as

y as the phone buzzed relentlessly like a heartbeat, scorching against my ski

then it started again. She was not giv

e that the name on the screen was the woman living in our

and Valerie would know I was alive. One press

red, trembling.