IE'S

l, had died long ago. And today, like every day, I was dragging the bones of what was left into the damn building just

hated M

anything. I

very morning thinking, maybe today he'l

, stup

ke a ghost in her own skin. No one could tell though. I was always on time. Always put-together. Always

ng. I handled everything. I made sure the empire Calhoun was trying to

t see that.

ors. I double-checked the contracts coming in from the trading sectors. I filed the latest correspondence from the N

as just the

man I was slo

anced at the clock t

His me

to walk into his office again and pretend like I hadn't spent the entire weeke

es just to give my hands something to do, anything to stop t

the thick double doors of his office. My chest tightened

en I h

ght

hed. Femi

stoppe

rozen until my fingers hovere

I'd know i

ela

elt like it wanted to shrink, disappear into the f

ened th

ined from my face the

ng on his goddamn de

the one fruit Calhoun always said he hated while his hand worked effortlessly on his

dn't b

ere, stunn

nob like it was the only thi

died when s

tely. But when he did. his eye

er tone as she glared at me like I was filth

lin

t. Not just of what I

up I used when I had a fever. The one who never let me sit too close, who acted like my very presence disturbe

as th

up at me again. Hi

ething trivial. "What do you want? Why are y

face. I wanted to scream and cry.

iated. Heartb

y a whisper. "You have a mee

w what came over me-maybe instinct, maybe worry.but I took half a step for

Calh

n nearly sh

tely reached for the other mug on his table, a ceramic one he never let anyone touch. The one I'd tried

sip, whispering something I couldn't hear. His hand never left her body-gentle strokes on her

. God, it h

est version of hi

wasn't

ever bee

n't stop. A tear slipped out before I could catch it. I sni

the first time in that room. I couldn't read what was behind

be she did-and pressed a possessive kiss to his lips. Her hand came up and wrapped

smiled. A sof

e purred. "You'd do anything to

olders I held. It took everything in me n

twitched into

mth on his face like that. And it was lik

rs, and with a small,

. Anything

ing f

t

er

ds tre

The thing I'd always be

he had just drunk from-and without h

didn't

't ques

. drank

. From her hand. H

e someone had thrown a bu

I used once. He wouldn't eve

was sharin

version I never got to meet. One I begged for in silence, dreamed

had always be

ack to reality-just barely. I glanced down at the screen. It

nd lowered my gaze to hide t

Alphas are still waiting for your response.

t a little. Enough to see Carmela roll hers

ly at me. "I swear, I hate this Gamma of

iffe

his glare

dark eyes that had once

not even sparing me a full glance. "My future Luna

ting, or maybe to suggest someone else deliver the messa

ngs," he said, sharply. Like it was a remi

ly I had to clench my fists

form to reschedule the session. I was just about to turn when Carmela let ou

best broth in the office. I'd like to try one. I'll stay back her

ngs l

no. N

d her. Go make the broth. Sta

consideration. No look at me to see

it hurt to even curv

, Al

est ached. My eyes burned. But I walked out.

to convince my

to pull myself

holding the tray, the first thi

ie with both hands, like a perfect little wife. His head bent

quietly. As I turned toward her with the bowl, Cal

o her, placed it gent

ked up the spoon, took a sip And

ore she shrieked. I barely had time to step bac

hirt, scalding heat burning into

mbling back, trying

e wasn

. She hurled it with such rage I couldn't dodge it fast enough. It shattered right

own. I staggered and caught myself on th

wing a dangerous amber.

mma. What were you try

ldn't

came out. Just stuttering breaths and shame burni

or bur

ed by a few staff members

a.Carmela

-like she'd rehearsed this moment. She rushed into his arms

because I told her off earlier for interrupting us. She

eart pounding, waiting-just waiti

he d

ispered something in h

someone behind m

ed by seventy percent. And make sure she learns to make better

Carmela's waist, gently tugged

was

uest

def

ance

that, I wa

ed, bleeding, humiliated as the

into pieces no one woul