But I knew, that when I did that, he would go away. I know he will go without saying a word and he will never come back.
He would leave her as silently as he came.
But I also knew it was the right thing to do. No one in their right mind would tolerate something like this. Having a secual affair with someone thwy barely know for more than two years. Someone they hadn't seen before on broad daylight. I too, can barely remember what his face looks like. I have wanted to do this for a long time now. God knows how long I have been meaning to tell him to leave.
Then, I felt the bed sink, and I felt him lie down, and pulled me closer to him. I opened my mouth and was about to speak, but before I could do that, his mouth hit mine.
And in the hours that followed, I didn't think at all.
But I felt. And I felt good and that was alot.
Two hours passed by easily and it was still dark, when I felt him move.
I just lay on the bed as I watched him move. He doesn't even make a noise. Which, is weird. All you can hear is the sound of clothes being adjusted and being worn. Which is like listening to nothing.
Although I couldn't see him, I see his shadow move and from what I could see, even in his shadow, he had a masculine grace when he moved.
A masculine grace that is powerful. Again, it's weird. Just seeing my dream lover dressing up. it's like I'm watching a badass, macho dance, if there is one. But of course, we all know that there is no such thing and that only happens in my room every time he gets dressed when he visits me. No. Whenever he needed to leave.
Watching him dress is so addicting that I thought, maybe I can sell tickets at Manila bay for this show. For sure I'm going to be rich if I do that. But I know I'll also have to share him. Thinking of sharing him and letting someone watch him get dressed messed up my mind.
The fact that he came tonight, and I let him come and he made me come and him coming after I come, already messed with my head, maybe I shouldn't have thought of selling tickets.
Damn, I have been sharing too much. sorry girls if I'm going to disappoint all of you, but I ain't sharing anymore. Well maybe not consciously though.
He came to the bed and as usual, I watched him again. He bent low and I felt the heat of his hand on my knee, while his fingers curled around the back of my knee and he lightly kissed my hip. His lips skimmed across my skin that made me tingle. Then he slid the covers up my body and dropped them.
I was lying on my side and my hands were tucked under my face and he came up to me and his face bent low once more and kissed me at the back of my ear. his fingers slid under my hair and said, "see you later, babe, "
"Laters," I whispered back.
His head moved and his lips skimmed the back of my ear and his tongue touched there. That act, made my skin tingle, too. It tingled so much that my whole body ahivered.
He pulled the covers up my body to my shoulder and then he turned around and leave.
He was gone. No noise, not even the noise of the door opening and closing. He was just gone like he'd never been there.
Weird and crazy, right?
I satred at the door of my bedroom for a while. My body felt warm and sated but most of all tired. My mind didn't feel the same though.
I turned my back and tucked the covers around my naked body as I stared at my bedroom's ceiling. Thinking.
God I didn't even know his name.
"Fuck," I whispered to myself, "I am suck a freaking slut,"