Later, I saw the video: he watched my call come in and, at his sister' s urging, let it go to voicemail. He abandoned me to die.
After escaping with my life, I disappeared.
Two years later, he saw my face on the cover of a magazine-a celebrated artist with a new life and a new love. And he finally understood what he had lost.
Chapter 1
It was our anniversary, the day we met, the day Kellen said he first fell in love with me. Now, for the thirty-eighth time, he was going to break up with me.
The stale air of his campaign office clung to me. It smelled of ambition and old coffee. Kellen stood by the window, his back to me, the city lights a blurred backdrop to his perfect silhouette. He was handsome, undeniably. Charismatic. The kind of man who could charm a room with a single smile, leaving everyone convinced he was on their side.
He turned, his blue eyes, usually so vibrant, clouded with a practiced sorrow. This was the sorrow he reserved just for me, for these moments.
"Hayden," he began, his voice a low rumble. "We need to talk."
My stomach didn't drop. My heart didn't clench. There was no surge of panic. Just a dull, familiar ache, like a phantom limb. I knew what was coming. I always knew.
"Cherrelle," I said, my voice flat, devoid of emotion. It wasn't a question. It was a statement.
He flinched, a slight tremor in his jaw. My calm always unnerved him. He preferred me crying, begging, making a scene. It made his performance feel more real, I suppose.
"She's having another episode," he confessed, running a hand through his perfectly coiffed hair. "The paranoia is back. She says she saw you... she thinks you're trying to sabotage me again."
"Again?" I deadpanned. "When was the first time, Kellen? Or the second? Or the thirty-seventh?"
He ignored my sarcasm. "She's threatening to go public about... about her past. The DUI. The accident. It would ruin everything. My campaign, my future."
His future. Always his future. Never our future.
"And what about my future?" I asked, but the words felt hollow. I didn't expect an answer. I never got one.
He stepped closer, his hand reaching for mine, then hesitating. It was always like this. A half-hearted gesture, a show of guilt he couldn't fully commit to. My hand remained stubbornly at my side.
"Just for a little while, Hayden," he pleaded, his voice dropping to a whisper. "Until she stabilizes. Until the election is over. Then, we can... we can fix everything. I promise."
I didn't laugh. Laughter required energy I no longer possessed. "How long is 'a little while' this time, Kellen? A month? Two? Until the next crisis? Or the one after that?"
His gaze fell. "Hayden, please. You know how she is. She needs me."
"And I don't?" My voice was barely a whisper. The words were automatic, muscle memory from years of this charade.
"You're strong, Hayden. You always have been. She's fragile." He used that word often. Fragile. A delicate flower, easily crushed, while I was the sturdy oak, expected to weather every storm.
I closed my eyes, a wave of exhaustion washing over me. I was so tired. So utterly, completely tired of being the strong one.
"Fine," I said, opening my eyes. "Let's get this over with."
He looked surprised. Relieved, even. As if I was doing him a favor by not putting up a fight.
We walked in silence to the campaign office's legal department. The secretary, Ms. Albright, didn't even look up as we entered. She simply reached for a pre-printed stack of papers. She'd filled out enough of these "temporary separation" documents over the years to know the drill.
"The usual, Mr. Jefferson?" she asked, her voice as neutral as her beige cardigan.
Kellen nodded, avoiding my gaze. "Yes, Ms. Albright. And ensure the press statement goes out immediately. Standard wording."
She typed with practiced efficiency, the click-clack of the keyboard filling the silence. The document slid across the polished mahogany desk. It was always the same: "irreconcilable differences," "mutual decision," "respect for privacy." Lies, all of them.
Sign here, Hayden Black.
My hand hovered over the signature line. A flicker of resistance, a ghost of the young woman I used to be, electric with hope, burned for a fleeting second. I remembered the first time. The tears, the desperate pleas, the agonizing hope that it would be different. The second, the tenth, the twentieth. Each time, a little piece of me chipped away. By the thirtieth, I was numb. By the thirty-seventh, I was a robot. And now, the thirty-eighth.
I picked up the pen. It felt heavy in my hand, a symbolic weight. I signed my name, each letter precise, deliberate. It was a signature of surrender, but also, something else. A signature of finality.
"Hayden!"
The voice cut through the sterile air, sharp and shrill. Cherrelle. Even her presence felt like a physical assault. She stood in the doorway, framed by the bright office lights, a triumphant smirk twisting her delicate features. Her red dress clung to her, a stark contrast to my worn black one. She looked like a predator, and I, her prey.
"What are you doing here?" Kellen snapped, his composure crumbling.
"Just coming to congratulate my brother on his wise decision," she purred, her eyes, Kellen's eyes, glinting with malice as she looked at me. "And to make sure everything was... official."
She strutted in, a freshly printed copy of the signed document already clutched in her hand, as if she' d been waiting outside the door for the ink to dry. She waved it in my face, a trophy. "See, Hayden? He chose me. He always chooses me."
A wave of exhaustion, so profound it felt like a physical blow, washed over me. I wanted to scream. I wanted to lash out. But I was just so, so tired.
"Cherrelle, enough," Kellen warned, his voice strained. He looked between us, a trapped animal.
Her expression shifted instantly, morphing from triumphant sneer to tearful fragility. "Oh, Kellen! You're mad at me? After everything I've been through? After what she did?" She clutched her head, swaying dramatically. "My anxiety... it's coming back."
Kellen' s shoulders slumped. The familiar script. The predictable outcome.
Cherrelle caught my eye, a malicious glint piercing through her feigned distress. "You know, Hayden," she simpered, "Kellen and I are going to celebrate. A fresh start. You should join us. For old times' sake." The invitation was a barb, meant to twist the knife.
Kellen' s eyes, filled with a plea I' d seen a thousand times, met mine. Play along. Just for now.
My lips, dry and cracked, curved into a mirthless smile. "Why not?" I said, the word a foreign taste in my mouth.
Cherrelle's eyes widened, a flicker of surprise mixing with her triumph. Kellen looked shocked, then relieved. They always expected me to fight, to scream, to make their pantomime harder. Not today. Today, I was just surviving.
The ride to the restaurant was a suffocating silence. Cherrelle sat beside Kellen in the back, her head occasionally resting on his shoulder, his arm a hesitant shield around her. I sat in the front, beside the driver, as far away from them as possible. The rearview mirror caught Kellen's troubled gaze, but I refused to meet it. I was a ghost in my own life, invisible, unheard. He touched Cherrelle's hair, a soft, comforting gesture, and she leaned into him, a possessive smile hidden from my view, but not from my mind. He never touched me like that, not anymore. Not when she was watching. He was her protector, her keeper, forever bound by a guilt I only vaguely understood.
A cold rain began to fall as we pulled up to the restaurant, streaking the car windows like tears. It always rained on these nights, I thought. Or maybe it just felt like it. The weather, like my life, was a perpetual state of gray. My mind drifted back, to a time when Kellen' s touch was real, when his promises weren' t hollow echoes.
We met at a music festival, a whirlwind of sun and song. He was a rising political star, I was a budding songwriter. We fell in love under a sky full of stars, our dreams as bright as the constellations. He swore he' d never let anything come between us. His family, he' d warned me, was complicated. His younger sister, Cherrelle, was particularly sensitive. She'd been through a lot. A "difficult past," he'd called it.
That difficult past reared its ugly head on our wedding day. A DUI, a car accident that nearly took her life, all covered up by Kellen to protect her and his nascent career. But the guilt, oh, the guilt had festered in him like a poison. Cherrelle, a master manipulator, had weaponized it, turning her "trauma" into a leash around Kellen's neck. "PTSD," she'd claimed, "addiction," she'd cried. And Kellen, noble, guilt-ridden Kellen, had been trapped.
"She just needs time, Hayden," he'd always say, his eyes full of pain. "I owe her. I have to protect her."
His protection, however, had always come at my expense. He' d orchestrate these public breakups, always when Cherrelle felt threatened by my presence, always when his career was on a knife-edge. Then, in private, he' d find his way back to me, full of apologies and promises of a future that never arrived. Thirty-eight times. Each cycle draining me further, leaving me hollowed out, a shadow of the woman I once was. My optimism had long since curdled into a bitter numbness.
I looked out at the rain, my reflection a pale, unfamiliar face. The woman I once was, the one who believed in love and happy endings, was gone. Replaced by this weary shell.
A fierce, cold resolve solidified within me. The rage, long dormant, began to stir. This was it. No more. I was done being the sacrificial lamb. Done being the puppet in their twisted play.
I pulled out my phone, my fingers trembling slightly as I scrolled through my contacts. It had been years since I'd spoken to him, but his number was still there, a beacon in the dark. My grandfather. Kennard Morse. The legendary music producer, the man I' d abandoned for Kellen, the man who represented everything I' d walked away from. He was my only way out.
The phone rang twice, then a gruff, familiar voice answered. "Hayden? Is that really you?"
"Grandpa," I whispered, my voice breaking. "I... I need your help."
"Hayden, my dear girl. What's wrong? You sound..." He paused, searching for the right word. "Broken."
"I am," I admitted, a single tear escaping, tracing a path down my cheek. It was the last tear I would shed for them, I swore. The last one. "I'm finally broken. And I need to disappear."
He didn't hesitate. "Tell me where you are. I'll send someone."
"No," I said, wiping my face with the back of my hand. "It's more complicated than that. I need a new life, a new identity. I need to be untraceable."
"Consider it done," he said, his voice firm, resolute. "You are my granddaughter. I'll move heaven and earth for you. Just tell me what you need."
"Everything," I whispered. "I need everything new. My life, my music, my future."
A pause. Then, "That's my girl. We'll turn this pain into art, just like old times. You just focus on getting well. I'll handle the rest."
I hung up, a strange mix of terror and exhilaration coursing through me. I was finally choosing myself.
We entered the restaurant, a lavish affair bursting with Kellen's political donors and media contacts. Cherrelle clung to Kellen's arm, her voice bubbling with feigned delight. She hogged his attention, pulling him into conversations, her eyes darting back to me, ensuring I saw her victory.
I was an appendage, a ghost they occasionally acknowledged with a strained smile, a fleeting touch on the elbow. I felt the whispers, the curious glances. Everyone knew Kellen had just publicly broken up with me, for the thirty-eighth time. They just didn't know the why. They never did.
Cherrelle, ever the showman, caught sight of a waiter passing with a tray of hot coffee. Her eyes lit up with a malicious spark. She pulled Kellen' s ear close, whispering something that made him frown, then sigh, then nod. My blood ran cold. I knew that look.
She detached herself from Kellen, sashaying towards me with a saccharine smile. "Hayden, darling," she cooed, her voice dripping with fake concern. "You look utterly lost. Let me get you something warm."
Before I could react, she "accidentally" stumbled, the tray of scalding coffee tipping from her hand. It arced through the air, a dark, dangerous wave, aimed directly at my chest, at the intricate, hand-stitched detailing of the performance outfit I was supposed to wear at the fundraiser tomorrow.
The wet heat seared through the fabric, blooming across my skin. I gasped, a sharp, choked sound. The delicate embroidery, weeks of work, instantly ruined, stained beyond repair.
Cherrelle, her eyes wide with feigned horror, shrieked. "Oh my god, Hayden! I'm so, so sorry! Are you alright?" Her apologies were empty, her gaze triumphant.
Kellen rushed over, but his eyes weren't on me. They were scanning the room, assessing the damage to his image. He pushed past me, his focus entirely on Cherrelle, who was now clutching her wrist and whimpering.
"Cherrelle, are you hurt?" he demanded, his voice laced with concern.
He turned to the waiter, his face a mask of controlled fury. "Handle this! And keep the press away!"
He didn't even look at me. Not once. He just abandoned me there, dripping with coffee, my outfit ruined, my skin burning, to manage the political fallout around his 'fragile' sister. He led Cherrelle away, his arm firmly around her, whispering reassurances. The room buzzed with whispers and pointed stares. I stood alone, a public spectacle of his latest betrayal, the hot coffee a cruel echo of the burning emptiness in my chest. The warmth of the coffee quickly turned to a numbing cold. I knew then, with a chilling certainty, that this was truly the end.